Sweethearts in a Getaway Car
by PartyhardDrunkard
Summary: She was no angel when he met her. He had ripped off her already damaged halo and replaced it with horns. He made her. And she, in return, had made him. [The Joker/OC]
1. Prologue

**Sweethearts in a Getaway Car**

**Prologue**

_My name is Phoenix Larkin Blake. I am twenty years old. I am in Gotham City. I am alive. I am not crazy._

Phoenix had to repeat that to herself the start of everyday, while staring at herself in the mirror (albeit, begrudgingly). Well...ever since what she called _the incident_, she had to repeat that to herself. Although, she was beginning to be very unsure of the last statement.

With a heavy sigh, the brunette turned off the light of her small bathroom and turned away from the mirror. She couldn't even bare to look at herself anymore. The scars upon her face made her think herself ugly. Especially after the fresh ones healed. People called her Scar for a reason. Although...he called her Scarface. She hated that.

When she had met him, she'd only had one scar on her face. It went just over her right eye and all the way up to her temple. She liked to cover it up with her half bangs. Now, she had a couple extra ones. Thanks to him. To J. Or, as most people tended to call him, The Joker. The Clown Prince of Crime. The Harlequin of Hate. Yadda, yadda, yadda.

Yet...why did Phoenix feel the need to free him? Why did she feel the need to scheme and plot to get him out of Arkham?

Well...she guessed that's what Bonnie and Clyde syndrome did to a person. Now, don't get her wrong...she had been no angel when she met him. He had just...broken her already damaged halo and replaced it with horns, so to speak. He had made her. And she, in return, had made him, in a way. They had complemented each other well, even if they hated to admit it.

A smile stretched across Phoenix's face as she made her way to her kitchen. She wasn't there for food, however. She had all of her plans laid out on the counters and the table. She was there to plot and scheme even more. Right now, she knew exactly who she needed to be J's psychiatrist. A blonde haired floozy, Harleen Quinzel. She would be perfect and, luckily, Phoenix happened to know her. J would fuck the bitch up and she would let him out. Now, Phoenix just had to hope that he wouldn't get himself too attached. If it even got that far, that is.

She paused a moment, her back hunching as she leaned on the counter. She was filled with a sudden sadness. The young woman was pretty sure that J didn't even know that she was still alive. She was pretty sure that he though she was dead. Hell, sometimes she thought she was dead. But, the way that Vicki Vale pestered her for interviews day after day definitely said otherwise. Everyone wanted to know what it was like to be on the inside of The Joker's lair, in the middle of all of his plans. Everyone wanted to know what he was like in private. And Phoenix wouldn't give the media that satisfaction of knowing.

In all honesty, she couldn't care any less. Even if she fucking tried. All that she cared about was getting him back.

Getting him back so they could go back to being two sweethearts in a getaway car again.

And Phoenix Blake always got what she wanted, no matter what the cost.

**AN: ****_So, hi! I hope you liked the prologue of Sweethearts in a Getaway Car! This is my first Joker story. However, I cannot give myself all the credit here. This whole idea is based off the tumblr roleplays between myself, sexdrugsmxrder, and myfaceontheonedollarbill. The mun, Rachel/Mike, is a fucking fantastic roleplayer and has J's personality down to a T. Without them, I wouldn't be writing this story._**

**_*gets off my soapbox*_**

**_Now, go review and follow and yadda yadda!_**


	2. Sometimes Dead is Better

**Sweethearts in a Getaway Car**

**Sometimes Dead is Better **

* * *

><p><em>Three Months Earlier<em>

Phoenix Blake had had it. Absolutely had it. She was up to her eyebrows in bullshit and she sack of shit in front of her thought she was so stupid. She may have been young, but she was not someone to double cross the way that she had just been double crossed. You don't do that to someone. Especially not to her. He should have known by now that she could end him in a millisecond. But, of course, he was too cocky to ever admit that to himself or anyone else. And now the bastard was going to pay for it.

"Look _here_, buddy boy. You said you would have the money _two weeks ago. Of course_, you came up with an excuse not to get it to me and I let it slide. _Then_, we agreed on _tonight_ and guess the _fuck_ what? You _still_ don't have it. And _now_, you _know_ that _I know_ that you're lying through those _pretty little teeth_ of yours. And, you're _still_ not fessing up to fucking me over? _C'mon_, Jack." The petite little spitfire monologued slightly, ominously twirling her switchblade between her nimble little fingers.

Still, the green eyed snake in fort of her looked at her like she had grown three heads. She wanted to kill him. And she probably would end up killing him. But, she wanted her fucking money back first. Then, she could stick a knife into his brain.

"I'm sorry-" The asshole started, but was quickly cut off by the brunette.

"_Fuck_ your '_sorry_', you asshole! _Where's_ my money?!" Phoenix shouted, slashing the young man's chest with her knife.

He stumbled backwards with a surprised groan before he was pushed flat onto his back by a swift kick in the face from the tiny drug queen. He was extremely scared. In an alley in the Narrows with no one else around and a crazy little scarred up bitch after him, who wouldn't be fucking scared?

Before he had a chance to get up to defend himself properly, she was straddling him. Her knife was nearly shoved into his jawline as she leaned her face close to his. She may have been small, but she knew how to use leverage to her advantage. And, in the position she was currently in, she had all the leverage she could ever want against the scumbag.

"You know, it didn't have to come to this. You could've just told me without any fuss."

The kid looked very confused, and terrified. He hadn't really done anything in that moment to warrant what he was being given, but he had done enough for Phoenix to use it as an excuse to carve him up.

"I-" He started, only to be cut off by a very painful jab of the knife going straight through his jaw. He wanted to scream, but he couldn't.

"Oh, shut the fuck up." Phoenix said lazily as the young man groaned out in pain, tears dripping out of his eyes, "You did this to yourself."

And then she cut out his tongue. She didn't care about the money anymore. She just wanted the little shit out of her hair. But, she wouldn't kill him quickly. No, definitely not. She would make it last, draw it out long enough for little Jackie Boy here to see how much of a coward he really was.

So, she got to work.

* * *

><p><em>Thirty minutes later<em>

Jackie Boy didn't even look like Jackie Boy anymore. Jackie Boy looked like a gutted pig. Or a cow. Phoenix didn't know, but he looked like some sort of animal that had been really fucked up. She was standing above him and he looked up at her with damaged and bloodshot eyes. The man was still alive, but only just. He wouldn't be alive for much longer. Too bad. Well, it wasn't like he didn't deserve it. She was pretty sure that he had fucked over many more people than just herself.

But, then...something in the air changed. Someone else was there. _Oh great, now I've gotta kill someone else. _Phoenix thought as she turned her head slightly over her right shoulder. She could see a silhouette, but nothing more. It was too dark for her to see much anymore.

"What do you want?" She snapped, twirling the bloody knife between her equally bloody fingers once again. She couldn't have any witnesses to this. She didn't want to be thrown into Blackgate. Again. That place was fucking terrible.

She knew that she'd have to kill whomever was there (and it looked like it would be easy with his hunched figure and all). And then the guy spoke and her mind went blank.

"Sometimes dead is, _uh_, be_tt_er."

_Oh, you've gotta be kidding me._

Yeah, there would be no killing this guy. She was lucky if she even got out of the alley alive, if his reputation meant anything at all. She couldn't even try to kill the fucking Joker. She wouldn't live to see the light of day. Oh well. Better to get on his good side than try to kill him anyway.

So, Phoenix turned around to face him and crossed her arms defensively over her chest. Her mind was still fucking reeling.

"I wouldn't know about that. I like playing with my food while it can actually bite _back_."

And then the clown smirked.

Phoenix knew she was already in too deep.

_Maybe sometimes dead **is** better._


End file.
